Perfection vs. Obedience

I was reading through my journal today and came across a quote I wrote down from a book I read last year.  It really stood out to me again today.  "The goal of perfection only points out how far I have to go but obedience marks how far I have already come. Perfection frustrates and torments. Obedience releases and makes whole." - Joanna Weaver.  I struggle with perfectionism.  Striving to be perfect in all areas of my life, including my walk with Christ, leaves me feeling inadequate.  One of my biggest fears is failure.  Most of the time I am so afraid of not being perfect and failing, that I do not even try.  I ignore the things that God puts in front of me because I am afraid I wouldn't be perfect. This is why it has been so hard for me to want to share my writing.  I have this ideal in my head that it needs to be perfect.

But this is where obedience comes in.  When you are obedient in doing something that God asks you to do, it is so freeing.  Living in obedience to Christ is what an abundant life looks like.  Being obedient is not always the easiest thing.  It is hard to put yourself out there, to step out in faith into something new.  But you aren't expected to be perfect.  You are just expected to take a step towards the life that Christ wants you to live.  Obedience releases you from the pressure of having to be perfect. It releases you to live life.

I might always struggle with perfectionism.  I still want to make the perfect dinner for my husband.  I still will want to have our home look perfect.  But if I focus my eyes ahead and on being the woman and the wife that God wants me to be,  I don't have to be perfect.  If I give into that pressure, than I will be paralyzed with fear because I don't want to fail.  Trying is being obedient.  Taking tiny steps of faith is being obedient. Trusting is living an abundant life.